Luckiest Girl Alive; the Emotional Evolution of Men Should not be Bought at the Cost of Women’s Trauma

I've been traveling a lot for work and one of my favorite things to see is people watching planes on movies. No, I do not watch planes on movies, I prefer to watch other people watching movies. You can tell a lot about the person in 12C by the films they choose to watch on an 8-hour red eye from New York to London. Why would you watch the entire Need for Speed trilogy? Or what would compel the parent in 24F to put on the movie Chucky for their nine year old daughter. Sometimes the movie is auxilary to the real show; how people react to films on planes. Flying tends to bring out the best and the worst in people, and it's hard to look away when you see someone sobbing while watching Sharknado. A movie that I've recently seen a lot of people watching on planes is Luckiest Girl Alive, a recent film starring Mila Kunis, Finn Wittrock, Scoot McNairy, Thomas Barbusca, Jennifer Beals, and Connie Britton and is based on a novel by the same name.

The people who watch this film on planes are almost all women, and almost all of them have cried. As a result, it's been really hard to get myself to watch the movie because I, like most people, do not necessarily enjoy crying. While it can be soothing, cathartic crying can easily snowball into crippling sobs and bawling in the shower for twenty minutes. As a result, I've avoided most dramas in recent years and refuse to watch My Octopus Teacher. A movie that makes people swear off of eating Octopus might make me depressed enough to swear off eating anything, in general.

I've been traveling a lot for work and one of my favorite things to see is people watching planes on movies. No, I do not watch planes on movies, I prefer to watch other people watching movies. You can tell a lot about the person in 12C by the films they choose to watch on an 8-hour red eye from New York to London. Why would you watch the entire Need for Speed trilogy? Or what would compel the parent in 24F to put on the movie Chucky for their nine year old daughter. Sometimes the movie is auxilary to the real show; how people react to films on planes. Flying tends to bring out the best and the worst in people, and it's hard to look away when you see someone sobbing while watching Sharknado. A movie that I've recently seen a lot of people watching on planes is Luckiest Girl Alive, a recent film starring Mila Kunis, Finn Wittrock, Scoot McNairy, Thomas Barbusca, Jennifer Beals, and Connie Britton and is based on a novel by the same name.

The people who watch this film on planes are almost all women, and almost all of them have cried. As a result, it's been really hard to get myself to watch the movie because I, like most people, do not necessarily enjoy crying. While it can be soothing, cathartic crying can easily snowball into crippling sobs and bawling in the shower for twenty minutes. As a result, I've avoided most dramas in recent years and refuse to watch My Octopus Teacher. A movie that makes people swear off of eating Octopus might make me depressed enough to swear off eating anything, in general.

Luckiest Girl Alive is a movie about a highly ambitious, socially elegant young woman by the name of Ani, who has gone to the right schools, has the perfect job, and is set to be married to a gorgeous man in a perfectly gorgeous wedding. She doesn't eat carbs because she is disciplined, and her narration is the only clue we have to the fact that her entire outward persona is a sham. The narration we get reveals that she is spiteful, sarcastic, biting, and deceitful, while her outward appearance remains poised, controlled, and perfect. As the movie goes on, little by little we discover the complicated layers that make up Ani and her need for control and power. A documentarian has been trying to convince her to sit down to talk about her role surviving a school shooting; but, as flashbacks and her deteriorating mental health and stability show, there is much more to the story than that.

This movie is a gorgeous criticism of victim blaming, of purity culture, of women being told to protect and hide men from the consequences of their actions, because it would be a shame to ruin the life of 'a promising young man,' a phrase now made infamous because of its use in the trial of Brock Turner, a Stanford student who was caught raping an unconscious girl and was giving a mockingly light sentence for his crime. It peels back the layers of hypocrisy in our society that say that a man should be allowed to have sex with whomever he pleases, and that a woman should be flattered if he picks her, even if she doesn't want it. It forces us to confront that we would much rather women deal with the trauma of being a victim in silence and isolation, while men are allowed to use their victimhood to elevate themselves to hero status. It shows that if we are shown a man who is doing good and the shattered woman he broke on his way, we think it is a fair price to pay.

In a post #metoo era of reckoning, this film confronts how often we are more concerned that it will hurt men's feelings to be painted as the bad guys, than we are concerned with the wellbeing of the women they hurt. The film can be wrapped up in the final moments, when a fellow reporter who has followed Dean's career in campaigning for increased gun restrictions basically tells Ani that she has ruined things for everyone. Complicity is expected. Women are the stones that men sharpen themselves against, so they can do battle with anything other than themselves.

I was shattered when I watched this movie, which, as expected, I watched on a plane. Statistically, there were probably several women on my plane who have been victims of sexual violence. Statistically, there were probably several men on my plane who had been perpetrators of violence, But it comforts me to see Kunis's face on screen. Not in a romcom, but in a role with gravitas and meaning; a film that confronts what we don't want to talk about and is willing to splash it across the screens of hundreds of planes filling the sky. Perhaps if enough people watch it, if enough people are forced to confront the reality of what women are expected to suffer silently, maybe we will get somewhere and move the needle just a little bit forward.

Luckiest Girl Alive is a movie about a highly ambitious, socially elegant young woman by the name of Ani, who has gone to the right schools, has the perfect job, and is set to be married to a gorgeous man in a perfectly gorgeous wedding. She doesn't eat carbs because she is disciplined, and her narration is the only clue we have to the fact that her entire outward persona is a sham. The narration we get reveals that she is spiteful, sarcastic, biting, and deceitful, while her outward appearance remains poised, controlled, and perfect. As the movie goes on, little by little we discover the complicated layers that make up Ani and her need for control and power. A documentarian has been trying to convince her to sit down to talk about her role surviving a school shooting; but, as flashbacks and her deteriorating mental health and stability show, there is much more to the story than that.

This movie is a gorgeous criticism of victim blaming, of purity culture, of women being told to protect and hide men from the consequences of their actions, because it would be a shame to ruin the life of 'a promising young man,' a phrase now made infamous because of its use in the trial of Brock Turner, a Stanford student who was caught raping an unconscious girl and was giving a mockingly light sentence for his crime. It peels back the layers of hypocrisy in our society that say that a man should be allowed to have sex with whomever he pleases, and that a woman should be flattered if he picks her, even if she doesn't want it. It forces us to confront that we would much rather women deal with the trauma of being a victim in silence and isolation, while men are allowed to use their victimhood to elevate themselves to hero status. It shows that if we are shown a man who is doing good and the shattered woman he broke on his way, we think it is a fair price to pay.

In a post #metoo era of reckoning, this film confronts how often we are more concerned that it will hurt men's feelings to be painted as the bad guys, than we are concerned with the wellbeing of the women they hurt. The film can be wrapped up in the final moments, when a fellow reporter who has followed Dean's career in campaigning for increased gun restrictions basically tells Ani that she has ruined things for everyone. Complicity is expected. Women are the stones that men sharpen themselves against, so they can do battle with anything other than themselves.

I was shattered when I watched this movie, which, as expected, I watched on a plane. Statistically, there were probably several women on my plane who have been victims of sexual violence. Statistically, there were probably several men on my plane who had been perpetrators of violence, But it comforts me to see Kunis's face on screen. Not in a romcom, but in a role with gravitas and meaning; a film that confronts what we don't want to talk about and is willing to splash it across the screens of hundreds of planes filling the sky. Perhaps if enough people watch it, if enough people are forced to confront the reality of what women are expected to suffer silently, maybe we will get somewhere and move the needle just a little bit forward.

Mulan Shouldn’t Have to Act Like a Man to be a Hero

“We don’t want a female hero who acts like a man. We want a female hero who shows that women who act like women can be heroes too.”

My mom and I used to watch the original Mulan all the time. As a chinese immigrant, there were very few movies or cultural figures that my mother and I could bond over that were Asian, or were suitable for children, or ideally, both. Mulan was one of our favorite movies to watch together because it not only bridged that gap, but it went one step ahead and provided a disney princess at last that was strong, smart, independent, and doesn't need a prince to save her. She actually saves the prince. Hell, she saves all of China.

Last night, a lovely lover of mine came over for a night of takeout and to watch Mulan. I'd already had my misgivings about a movie that was going to cost 30 dollars on top of needing a subscription to Disneyplus, in the middle of a pandemic, with unemployment at 10%, but I was willing to give it a shot considering all the fanfare this movie had received. It seemed like a low blow for a corporation that had already bullied its way into reopening many of its theme parks despite high Covid infection rates, and that sits on top of money like a brooding chicken. I get it that they wanted Mulan to have a huge release in theaters, but was punishing their loyal fans with theater-prices the best way to do it?

When the movie starts out, there's a familiar scene involving some chickens and a younger Mulan, except this time she also has a sister. The colors are rich and vibrant, and gives a cheerful and gorgeous salute to the brightness of the animated movie. I was entranced, but I have to say it all went downhill from there.

What happened to you Mulan? The original movie was funny, clever, kind and caring and full of scenes that showcased her moments of kindness and individuality, like pulling the strand of hair from her updo before meeting the matchmaker, of giving her dog little brother his bone, or of taking care of her lucky cricket. All of those iconic bits gave us a sense of Mulan as a person whose courage and bravery lies not in masculine strength, but in emotional depth and intelligence. In the new movie, there is no sense of her wit or resourcefulness. Instead, what we're given is a Mulan who is quiet, sullen, and does her best to match up with the boys in terms of manly strength. Her chi, which is what they call her innate fighting skills, are really a poor prop to disguise the sad truth of so many action-hero movies that try to be more inclusive by making their heroes women. We don't want a female hero who acts like a man. We want a female hero who shows that women who act like women can be heroes too.

Mulan spends almost none of the movie showing watchers how its her cunning, and her ability to subvert male expectations of what strength looks like, that are her biggest strengths. Instead, she spends much of it moodily isolating herself from her peers, hiding her talents, and feeling guilty about her indescribably brave act of defiance. If I wanted to watch a movie of someone doing that, I would watch literally any Christopher Nolan movie and call it a day. I missed the sense of playful camaraderie and friendship of the original film, the clever tricks and tactics she uses, the light banter. This movie wants to be taken seriously so badly, that even hints of lightheartedness are whisked away before the watchers have time to blink. You don’t get to know the personalities of any of her friends or loyal sidekicks. Even Cricket is now a person in her battalion, but still has less than a tenth of the personality of the voiceless animated insect. The only character that could possibly be argued to have gotten more complex is the antagonist of the film. Mulan's new villain is no longer Shan Yu, a Han chieftain, but Xian Lang, a powerful shapeshifter and exiled witch. So powerful, in fact, it's hard to see why on earth she plays the simpering, downtrodden ally to the much more predictable and mundane bad guy of Bori Khan. While there is a more deep and emotional connection between Mulan and Xian Lang (hey, the one thing we have in common is that we are both female, and therefore always going to be exiles!) her character spends the majority of the movie being miserably one-dimensional and then, in her moment of much-needed triumph, instead of fighting she shows the backbone of a block of tofu and falls all to easily, because god forbid a woman be alone without also feeling suicidal.

Those costumes though 😍

Not to give too much away, but the live-action hardly sticks to the script of the main movie. There are glaring plot holes that took me out of the viewing to wonder out loud how that made any sense, and that was even after I accepted at face value the random phoenix (which is greek mythology, by the way) and the removal of her family dragon (although I will give them a point for not having Eddie Murphy in it this time around). But at the end of the day, this is still supposed to be a disney film that the whole family can enjoy. What happened to all the amazing songs that I could sing along to with my mom? What happened to all the funny jokes and hilarious moments? What we were given was a movie that took itself too seriously that was grim, unsympathetic, and downright boring that lacks entertainment value in its quest to try and force us to believe that women can be plausible heroes. Seriousness does not equate plausibility.

One of the other cruxes of the film is that Mulan cannot access her full chi until she is honest and true about who she is. That is a noble idea; but it makes it feel like being a woman is a shameful secret that she needs to out, and even when in one on one combat with her adversary, her reluctance to admit to her secret shows less about her need to keep her identity hidden and felt more like a moment of shame or embarrassment. I get it though, she’s worried about jeopardizing her family and whatnot, but did she really need to unleash her hair for one of her most hardcore battle scenes? Why can’t women warriors have their hair in ponytails?

Of course, I suspect most of most likely already know about the hot water Disney is in for filming parts of Mulan in the Xinjiang region, where the Chinese government has held Muslim ethnic minorities in detention camps. Apparently, if you look closely there are certain shots where you can see the detention camps in the background, but I didn’t want to watch the film again to try and find them, but I’m sure you can do that yourself. Finally, though, in the spirit of trying to find the silver linings because I want Disney to make more Asian-related content, I will say several good things about the film. Firstly, I thought that the costume and set designs were great. I really enjoyed the bright colors, rich details, and soft nods to traditional Chinese garb. I also really enjoyed how they made several nods to classic kung fu action movies in the styling of the choreography etc, and the sound track, which borrows heavily from the original, and it was lovely to see them actually choosing Chinese actors (goodbyeeee Eddie Murphy) as well. So, I guess it wasn’t a total wash?

All in all, the new Mulan teaches us that being a girl who does all the manly things will bring you success. If you're not a chi-wielding kung fu boss though, never you fear. You can still make a good match like Mulan's sister, whose sole purpose in the film is to be afraid of bugs before finally getting married to someone who will take care of the spiders for her. So being a woman will still work out fine for you! Really though, I'm so sad that this movie didn't live up to its potential. How could you fuck up the baseline plot of a woman who is so cunning, so resourceful, and so brave that she subverts the cultural narrative that war is a man's job, and that only men are strong, to save her entire country? Why make her a hero by forcing her to act like a boy? Because feminism isn't saying that women should act like men to be heroes. It's saying that being a woman is enough.

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The Whorticulturalist is the mother of this magazine. She is a sex-positive blogger and creative who enjoys rock climbing, dancing, and camping. In her spare time, she’s probably flirting.